Things that make me feel old, 2019 edition

"Bryan doesn't drive a 1M" (bryantakespictures)
11/15/2019 at 09:56 • Filed to: None

What is HBO Max?

Tik Tok

How come movies I like are called “Dad Movies” now? I liked some of those before I was a dad.

Albums I bought new are having 20 year anniversaries

My waist size

Steering wheel buttons and the buttons below the steering wheel near the door (do we have a name for these?) usually for traction control and other stuff

My back

I lost track of which Pixels and iPhones we’re on

Sometimes, just a little bit, I think my car might be too loud

Dubstep, which previously made me feel old, is old now

I get unreasonably excited when I hear about a video game that takes less than 10 hours to complete

Hearing internet phrases IRL annoys the shit out of me

My embarrassment level is getting shockingly low. It feels like a superpower.

I’m way too excited that they have recliners at my local movie theater now

I don’t know what channel Rick and Morty is on

Ha, what’s a “channel?”

I was a very early adopter of cord cutting, but now I can’t even keep track of the streaming services I’m paying for, let alone new ones.

What is HBO Max?

DISCUSSION (39)

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 10:19

My back

Dude... Solidarity.

AestheticsInMotion > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 10:21

Kinja'd!!!

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > AestheticsInMotion
11/15/2019 at 10:28

Do prequel memes make me feel old or young? Episode I came out 20 years ago!

nerd_racing > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com
11/15/2019 at 10:32

I sneezed the other day and hurt my back.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > nerd_racing
11/15/2019 at 10:34

Yup. Like an idiot, I decided to join a bowling league with friends, and had a terrible back spasm after the 2nd week. My 12 year old is filling in for me...

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 10:35

LOL

Ready for an adventure! > AestheticsInMotion
11/15/2019 at 10:46

internet says, when is somebody gonna bundle all these and sell it a “Cable ” again?

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 10:56

OK Boomer

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/15/2019 at 11:05

I was going to mention that, but I couldn’t make a coherent point.

I’m solidly with the Millennials on the idea behind the phrase (full disclosure, I was born in 1984 which usually gets included in the Millennial generation even though I identify more with the Gen-X mindset). It’s funny that the best response to the many, many butt-hurt op-eds about the offensiveness of the phrase is actually “ok boomer.” I legitimately enjoyed it the first 100 or so times I saw it.

But...

Now that it’s exploded and become a catch phrase, it feels more like nails on a chalkboard to me.

Just Jeepin' > nerd_racing
11/15/2019 at 11:21

I’ve hurt my back rolling over in bed.

Wacko > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:28

I’m born in 1979 and consider myself the last of the genX. 82ish and higher was genY

What makes me feel old is I started driving before some of my coworkers were born. And they never saw SpaceBalls...

I work in IT and was just talking with a coworker about our first computers and he had the look of I have no idea what you are talking about in his face

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:34

Sometimes, just a little bit, I think my car might be too loud

Heathen.

shop-teacher > Wacko
11/15/2019 at 11:43

I made a Back to the Future ref erence about an hour ago ... I got nothin’

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > Wacko
11/15/2019 at 11:43

I don’t know if gen Y is still a thing. Who knows what I am?

There was a clear generational shift between those who did not have cell phones in high school and those who did. I see that as the dividing line for Millennials, especially the cultural stuff like living at home and renting things instead of buying, etc. Less than 10% of my graduating class had their own cellphones, so I feel like I am in the gray area between generations.

shop-teacher > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:44

I’m 38, my beard is graying, I’ve always been fat but now I’m fatter , and frankly I’m finally coming into my own. My mom once told me I’d been 40 since I was 12. Now get off my lawn, you damn kids!

shop-teacher > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:46

I enjoy the irony of the fact that the boomers and the millennials bitch at each other about the exact same characteristics , which both groups exude.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
11/15/2019 at 11:47

My thought process for every gear as the RPM’s increase:

My car’s not that loud

Oh, I guess it’s a little loud

Hmmm, maybe I should get a quieter exhaust

*Crackle or pop on perfect upshift*

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:48

Since Kinja ruined my joke, #5 was a happy face

ttyymmnn > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:51

Have you gotten your invitation to join AARP yet? I have.

My son: “ Dad, did you record the soccer game?”

Me: “ Yeah, I taped it.”

This is a great list. And, coming as it does on my own 53rd birthday, it is especially appreciated.

My embarrassment level is getting shockingly low. It feels like a superpower.

I like this one particularly. You are only embarrassed if you choose to me. And with teenage sons, I can embarrass them seven ways to Sunday and then laugh at them.

ttyymmnn > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:53

Oh, and I’m also starting to notice Buicks. I think I have one foot in the grave already.

MrSnrub > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 11:58

I’m under 30 and all of these apply to me already. I don’t know what a dad movie is, but I’m sure that means it applies to me too .

Thisismydisplayname > Wacko
11/15/2019 at 11:59

Lol, I can relate to that. Born in ‘78 here. We get some youngins fresh out of school and the movie references just totally miss. But it is fun to stop and look at one of them and say “...you see, such and such is...” as we explain to the kiddo what the joke is in reference to. Oh good times.

Thisismydisplayname > ttyymmnn
11/15/2019 at 12:03

I thought Buick’s were invisible now? All those stupid commercials where people can’t seem to locate them.

Wacko > shop-teacher
11/15/2019 at 12:13

same here, and same coworker has never seen any back to the future movies ....

nor did he ever watch my other all time favorite Army of Darkness.

facw > shop-teacher
11/15/2019 at 12:14

You being 38 makes me feel old. Teachers (especially shop teachers) are supposed to me more than a year older than me.

shop-teacher > facw
11/15/2019 at 12:41

LOL! Yeah.

I just found out that my 20th high school reunion is the day after Thanksgiving. Probably won’t go. Funny thing, last month I was trying to remember the last name of the kid I punched in 7th grade, and drew a total blank. He was the one who reached out to one of my best childhood friends yesterday, asking if he knew about the reunion, and if he was going.

DasWauto > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 13:31

I’m 29, resemble entirely too much of this list and I don’t like it. :<

I actually took the aftermarket exhaust off my WRX this summer - it was a muffler delete and while hilarious on a good shift, it was obnoxious and painfully drone-y around my usual highway speed.

ST80MND > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 13:43

My embarrassment level is getting shockingly low. It feels like a superpower.

I thought I was the only one! Seriously, I laughed like hell reading this, thank you.

functionoverfashion > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 13:59

I felt old when I looked at a top albums list and didn’t know all the artists

shop-teacher > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 16:18

I graduated in ‘99, and back then if you got caught with a pager in school ... you were in deep shit.

Urambo Tauro > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/15/2019 at 21:08

I, too, hate how it’s caught on like wildfire. It’s become too easy of a way to dismiss anything and everything a boomer has to say, regardless of whether or not the boomer in question (or someone who just happens to share a boomer-associated view) is making a valid point.

pip bip - choose Corrour > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/16/2019 at 03:57

sadly i can actually relate to some of that

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
11/18/2019 at 16:27

I thought my truck was too loud once this summer after some *mods* . Turned out it was the drone. Resonators cleaned that up but also made it sound less nice. Oh well, still better than stock.

This is going to sound kinda prickish, but what that hell... setting off car alarms in parking garages was great fun. Don’t think it’ll do it now. That said I haven’t had the opportunity to try lately

Nibby > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
11/20/2019 at 16:54

RIP BABS

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Nibby
11/21/2019 at 12:44

Yeah... I *mostly* liked Babs, I didn’t think it was all on him, but I get it. And frankly I think that t hey should be able to bring back Carlyle and still sleepwalk to 100 points, so if Babs message was getting stale there wasn’t much point in going further down that road. I think he could have turned it around... I feel like this team got terrible luck early and their confidence went right down the shitter.

I’ve got confidence in Keefe. I was a bit worried by the Hakstol hire—seemed like a “watch your back Babs” assistant hiring— so I’m relieved he’s not going to be taking over. He’s bad enough in control of half a team... full control would be a nightmare. He needs to go as it is. I don’t get the logic of bringing in the underperforming Philly coach to run a defensive system. He wouldn’t know defense if it bit him in the ass.

Seriously. The PK is SO BAD— JUST LIKE HIS PHILLY TEAMS—they’d frankly be be tter off pulling the goalie every time they take a penalty. If the other team scores, oh well, it was going to happen anyway and now you’ve got another two minutes to make a come back. If you win the faceoff, all of a sudden you’re playing 5v5 but are allowed to ice the puck.. . Kapanen, Hyman and Souperman are all PKers. They’re all fast tenacious assholes. Sounds like fun to me.

^The worst part about that is I’m only half joking. And to think that a couple years ago the PK was so good that taking a penalty in the last couple minutes seemed like the surest way to hang onto a lead.

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

In other news, are you still doing highlights?

Nibby > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
11/21/2019 at 19:52

still am but sportsnet dropped us so just cutting hockey highlights for MSG teams like NYR, NYI, NJD, NYK

as for the leafs sad to see babs go but their issues run deeper than coaching. the defense has been a problem for years... this team was never a cup contender. playoff team? yes. it’s still early and they can turn it around and make it to the playoffs but getting rid of gardner and getting ceci didn’t help much... as for hakstol you’re pretty spot on... he’s an average coach at best. the way babcock coaches also isn’t a good fit for what the leafs are aiming for... he’s better suited for a western conference team

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Nibby
11/22/2019 at 06:55

Well, game 1, so far so good. Now we see if that was really night and day difference or if it was pure adrenaline. At this point, I’m just happy the team looks fun again under Keefe. If he can turn this year around it’s a bonus. They aren’t FAR out of the mix, but they’re far enough that they’re going to have to earn it.

Nibby > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
11/22/2019 at 08:43

they just need to go on a 16 game point streak...

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Nibby
11/22/2019 at 09:41

*ever the optimist, points to current 1-game point streak* “it’s a start.”

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

Yeah... thing is, it’s not a bad team on paper that’s chasing the pack, it’s one that should arguably be fighting for the division lead. I do think they’ll be able to make up the difference. Thinking of the 2016 Pens, last year’s Blues (which is a comparison I hate making because the only similarity is they were expected to be good last year) the 2017 Lightning* that got obliterated by injuries and still came back to within a point of making the dance. Pens are probably the closest comparable. Anyway we’ll see.

* On the subject of the Lightning, do you happen to subscribe to The Athletic? Sean McIndoe had a pretty funny list of Leafs excuses up... one of which was:

- Maybe should have been more specific when we found that withered monkey paw and wished that we’d play like the Lightning and avoid the Bruins in the playoffs.